C-Span interviews War Vets who have lost appendage

Here is the link. I have been watching the story of Michael Oreskovic who lost an arm and spent a very long time in 2005 at Walter Reed Hospital. The in’s and out’s of recovery are a major story. The constant operations, the constant drugs, the physical therapy, the prosthesis that doesn’t really work, the pressures on the extended family. Michael was not married when injured so his family had to step in. From Oregon, with a mother already very sick, the family had to reach out all the way to Washington, DC. The financial devastation to the family was severe as the father had to temporarily live near his son to provide care. The family pressures worsened the mother’s condition. The sister had to postpone college – no money. The whole experience is like a domino phenomenon. The father takes to drink. The injured son takes to drink and drug use. Getting caught up in the bureaucracy of medical care. The experience of constant phantom pain from the hand, arm and elbow that are no longer there. The son living at home for a while, which has its own set of pressures. It just goes on, and on, and on, and on. It is the story of people trying not to go down roads that will lead to destruction and learning to live with pain. It’s not pretty. There are a lot of people who really care and do their best to be there. But at best it is a story of people gasping for air.

I think that keeping our eyes open to pain is painful.

I’m not sure I can handle moral outrage against John Edwards

People are plenty mad at John Edwards. First, he’s a lawyer. (Sorry, I had to get that in!!) Second, he cheated on a wife with whom he went through the loss of a son. Thirdly, he cheated on a wife who is facing a life ending cancer. Four, he ran for President while knowing how easily things could have been derailed once the news got out. I could go on. Lots of us people do.

But people who have done recovery can’t be surprised. They know good people do dumb things that hurt lots of people. Recovery people have antibodies to the “how could yous”. They know how people could. They’ve read the Bible. They’ve found Christ while in the miry clay. They have drunk their money away, spent their kids’ college education money, gambled away the house, been filled with seven demons, acted in anger, said words that can’t be recalled, hardened themselves against others’ needs, overlooked cries for help and went on their next binge to get away from it all. Go to any recovery meeting of Christians and John Edwards is small potatoes. No gasps, surprises or shaking of heads in disbelief.

There is one thing else they know. If John Edwards wants to walk in the light again he is not going to have much company. The church stands for morality and can’t be seen as compromising. Most of his friends are gone and won’t be back. Politicians are sad he got caught, but once caught, the liability isn’t worth it. Society can’t risk their leverage. But he will always be welcome to a recovery meeting. Not because they have gotten use to sin and have no standards. But because they know sin and how deceptive are its ways. Everyone is game. And God is gracious to those who lose that game. They can’t afford moral outrage. There’s to much work to do. By the way, they aren’t critical of the consequences that will come upon Edwards. They will say such actions deserve the strong censure. But they will say that is not the end of the story.

So, welcome to recovery, John Edwards. And you are invited, too, Elizabeth. A lot of damage has been done and the soul work you are going to have to do will take a miracle. It’s not going to be easy being around a lot of people who are absolutely glad that what’s happened to you hasn’t happened to them. Quite frankly, you might need a different group.