Today’s Quote 3/19/07

It is fathers who have hope that chastise their sons.  Those whom they see to be entirely beyond hope and intractable they leave to do as they wish…The son whom they chastise is the one for whom they keep the inheritance.   Herveus

Don and Wild Turkey

No, not that Wild Turkey – the animal wild turkey. Yesterday I was hurriedly getting out of the house to get to Life Recovery at the Ministry Center. Stepping onto the screened-in porch without really looking around, before I knew it I was surrounded by a flapping wing span that seemed to fill the whole porch. It was pandemonium. I was running every which-a-way and the wings kept following me around. I couldn’t get a fix on what I had stepped into – just headed back into the house as quick as I could. (Wouldn’t Sharon have loved to have that on video!!!) Once safely back into the house I peered out the window and saw a wild turkey perched on top of the grill. It was humongous. Standing, its head almost reached my chest and its claws looked big enough to wrap around my head and pop it off.

We had left the front porch screen door open so that our dog could go in and out without us standing in the cold. Apparently the wild turkey had wandered in out of the backyard wetlands and couldn’t find its way out. It kept trying to fly through the screens and ripped them to shreds. (Yes, just add that to my Spring list of things to get done).

Finally it realized the door it came through was still open and slowly strutted out the front door and took its time walking back into the wetlands, leaving my bruised ego behind. Let me get this straight – I was hiding in the house from a turkey? Does my wife think less of me? I can’t help but think she wasn’t impressed with the absence of the “hunter of wild game” instinct. I did my best to explain why I wasn’t going out on the porch. But the bottom line is that I wasn’t going to go eye-to-eye with a turkey that could have me for Thanksgiving!!!!

When I walked into recovery and announced that I was recovering from a bought of wild turkey, they had to do a double-take. No, I said, I meant a real wild turkey. I mean it – it was a real wild turkey. Sure, Don, people see strange things after a day with wild turkey. Sometimes they think they even see what they are drinking.